I don’t know about you, but around this household, we know when spring has come, not by the first warm day nor by the date on the calendar. This household does not even rely on the sightings of the robin. Oh, no! We know spring is here by..... ants.

Yes! Ants! And not just any ant. In our home, the very first day we see the mighty carpenter ant... inside our house.... is the day we know spring is actually here. Ha!

According to this year’s calendar, spring began on the 20th. According to those pesky monsters, spring began the next night. Sunday, March 21st, was our official start to spring, when we stomped on our first ant of the season.

Soon to come... the exterminator! Another sign of spring!

I have always been fascinated by ants, and bugs, in general, but I have to admit, I really do not want to share my house with these creatures. Once, one walked on me while I still had my pajamas on and I felt it. I shook the pajamas to get rid of it and only felt a sting. The little monster bit me! I thought I had crushed it in the folds of the pajama but I only saw later that it had sunk its mandibles into the cloth and was not letting go. I tried to pry it off and it just chomped down harder! Well! I pulled and pulled and the little 3/4 inch monster would not let go!

I finally just pulled on it hard enough but succeeded only in dislocating its body from the head which was still attached to the pyjama! Tenacious little one! But... alas! I won! Victory was mine!

I am still fascinated by ants and I will stop to follow one if it has food in its mandible. Last summer, my daughter and I watched as one ant, with a cricket leg in its mandible, carried it to its nest somewhere in a tree in our neighbor’s yard. What a sight we must have been to anyone driving by... two people bent over just staring at the ground!

I do not go around squashing bugs, and much less little ants, but I also do not want them inside my house, especially making a meal out of it!

Ah, spring! I miss January already!

“An ant on the move does more than a dozing ox.”
~Mexican proverb

 
Have you ever, while waiting on a line for whatever, or while traveling on a train, bus, airplane, or just busily going about your business, been touched by a person and though you did not even say so much as a hello, you still remember that person even after years have passed? I wonder how many times that happens to someone, if at all?

This week I have been thinking of such two such people in my life. I don’t know why. In the past years since the following situations happened, I have remembered these people quite a bit.

The First: ( about twenty years ago)

I worked on 38th and Madison and I lived on the west side so I would take the subway to Times Square and then take the shuttle to Grand Central. I would then exit the station at a place on the platform that would leave me just around the corner of 42nd Street and Madison Avenue.

One Thursday, as I was getting out of the staircase, a man wearing a three-piece grey business suit and carrying a briefcase walked down the first flight of steps and sat down. My only thought was that I would never sit on the dirty steps in a suit as nice as his. I went to work.

Usually I would go home the scenic way; I would walk from 38th Street south to 34th. I would walk on 34th Street to Broadway and then I would walk to 96th Street and take the train home from there. On this day, I do not remember why, I decided to take the subway home so I went to the entrance I used. The man was still there! I was taken aback but continued on my way, feeling sad because I figured he was probably fired from his job.

The next day he was still there! This time his jacket and vest were missing and he had a couple of empty beer bottles by him.

The following Monday he was still there! This time his briefcase was gone and there was cardboard spread on the landing as a makeshift bed! His face had not been shaved. I did not even know if I should even say hi or ask how he was.

That subway entrance was this man’s home for weeks. People, including myself, were dropping dollar bills into an empty coffee cup which he ignored... but no one ever took it away from him.

To this day I think of him and wonder if I had just asked if he was okay that first day I saw him, or the second, if he would have stayed there. I was twenty three and not til much later did I wonder what I could have done to help him.

Do you believe in angels?

Have you ever wondered about a time you could have helped someone and didn’t and then thought about how you should have done something? Did you think it could have been an angel disguised as a stranger giving you an opportunity to do a good deed?

The Second: (about four years ago)

I rarely shop at Pathmark in Holbrook, having three other supermarkets within one mile distance from my home, but on this occasion I was looking for something and Pathmark had what I wanted.

As I was walking to the store after having parked my car, a lady with a young child walked up to me and showed me an index card. I read that she was from Slovenia and could not speak English. The card also mentioned that she did not have money to buy milk and eggs to feed her family. Using nonsense sign language I tried to convey to her that I had no money because I paid with an ATM card.

I walked into Pathmark feeling miserable and berating myself for not having petty cash on me. While I was waiting on line to pay, I had a great idea. I would bring the lady into the supermarket and let her choose her groceries and I would pay with the ATM card! I was excited and yet felt upset that I did not think about it sooner.

I was not in the supermarket longer than ten minutes but when I walked outside, she was gone. I got into my car and drove around the parking lot looking for her. Nothing!

I have kept awake at nights thinking about these two people. I have hoped that they are well and that someone with a better heart than mine helped them.

I now make it a habit to carry change. My experiences have given me insight I did not have before. I hope that I will not get caught off guard next time.

Who knows... I may have missed my opportunities to have helped angels in disguise... but even worse... people who really needed help at a difficult time in their lives.

“We are each of us angels with only one wing. And we can only fly by embracing each other.”
~Luciano de Crescenzo

 
When I sit on the left side of the sofa in the family room I can see out the window in the living room across the house.

Every now and then I would get a bit freaked out because I imagined I saw someone looking through the window. Then I realized that there is a small pine tree just outside the window and that it was probably swaying and it seemed like a person peeping through the window. I kept reminding myself to have the landscaper remove it in the spring.

Well, back in January, I walked in the 20" of snow with my camera to take a picture of a huge icicle that was dangling from the east side of the house. It was then that I saw footprints leading from the neighbors’ house to the window of our living room.

Now, it really wasn’t comforting to realize that I had not been imagining someone peeping through our window. In fact, I was rather upset that the girls next door have a need to spy into our home. Three summers ago I unknowingly stopped them from ringing our doorbell and running away. I was looking out the window of the office at a mother blue jay teaching her baby how to fly when I saw the older girl run from our house to hers. That was seconds after the door bell rang for the third time that night and the umpteenth time that summer. My daughter told them I saw them and though they denied it, the ringing stopped.

It was replaced by spying. Less noisy, I guess.

I was telling my friend, Liz, about having to buy or make drapes to keep the neighbor from looking in and she suggested the best thing! “Just make a sign that says ‘I know you are looking at us’ and put it on your window. ”

It may be that the girls are bored and have nothing better to do than to spy into our house or ring our doorbell. I, however, have my theory. I believe they have been hired by John Ashcroft.

It all makes sense now.

“If you mind your own business, you won't be minding mine.”
~Hank Williams

 
Warning: Contents may offend some, so if you don’t believe I have a right to speak my mind on any subject, especially about religion, STOP reading now.

I called my sister this morning to talk about Lord of the Rings winning all eleven of the Oscars for which it was nominated. The conversation turned to Catholicism because she asked if I had seen The Passion of the Christ. Somehow the conversation touched upon how I read a section of a book, Catholicism for Dummies, and how I was trying to find out the differences between Vatican Council I and Vatican Council II. I mentioned how I read that mass was said entirely in Latin only between 1939 and 1958 (and how I may have misunderstood). She then went on to say how Latin is the official language of the Vatican and how she is was skeptical on the point that I read about. I told her that I was only telling her what I read and that the book was written by priests. Her answer to me was, “So? That doesn’t mean anything!”

That reminded me of the time I took my mother to church for a Spanish mass and the priest told the congregation that he expects more people to take communion because they don’t have to go to confession in order to do so. That unless they have committed a mortal sin, they can take communion. Then a friend of mine told me how in her church the priest complained about too many people taking communion without having confessed first. I also know that this isn't particular to the Catholic church.

All of that confuses me. I do not go to mass because I fundamentally do not believe in some of the doctrine or dogma of the church. However, I do not study theology and can’t back up my beliefs enough to defend them and don’t believe I should have to. I believe that is called tolerance... or better yet, respect. But I do think that the church should at least be united in something as simple as communion and confession! I know it is quite naïve for me to expect so since even Mel Gibson doesn’t like the changes in the church made with Vatican II. Should he worry since throughout history the church has accused many of the faithful as heretics for not submitting to their point of view 100%?

What’s the point of this blog today? I don’t exactly know so don’t call me to say that I need to confess or something to that matter. I’ve been told that I am a “lost sheep” that needs to start going to church. The problem is that I do send a check to Planned Parenthood every year. I believe in what they do. I also believe pro-choice is a right. I believe that God created everyone, including homosexuals, and I believe they should have the right to marry. Those three points in themselves, I believe, can have me excommunicated from the church. That’s ok with me. I also believe that my faith is between God and me alone.

For someone whom the church may have issues with, I have been blessed in many ways. I am not in the best of health but I did survive a bout with cancer. I have a wonderful husband who is my best friend, my supporter, my buddy. I have been blessed with an intelligent, beautiful daughter even after doctors had told me I could never have any children. Someone once told me that I was punished by God and only had one child because of my belief in pro-choice. I disagree whole-heartily. I say.. I was blessed with one child because God chose me to take care of one of his angels. So the church may have issues with me but I believe God doesn’t.

Since this blog was a bit on the serious side, I will end with this quote....

“When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realized that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.”
~Emo Philips.

PS. WOO HOO!! Lord of the Rings and Peter Jackson rock!